Nightmares
by FornicatingDarren
Summary: The cave scene in Gale's POV


Katniss walks along the rocks. Her hands brush over the bloodstains Peeta has left behind. If she is trying to find him, she's headed in the right direction.

She falls to the ground and cradles her head in her hands. Is she crying? I can't tell. Part of me wants her to find Peeta, so he can protect her and keep her safe. But a smaller part, smaller and jealous part of me wants her to turn around and leave him to die.

"Peeta!" She whispers his name, "Peeta!" She repeats it, like a mantra. A mocking jay steals her voice. She looks up at the bird, and confused, but she stops calling his name.

She moves closer and closer towards the stream. Closer and closer towards him.

"You here to finish me off, sweetheart? " She doesn't see him.

She looks around, calling for him.

"Well don't step on me!"

She sees him and examines the clever camouflage that all of District 12 has been raving about.

Their words ring in my head.

"_That Peeta sure is a smart boy!"_

"_Maybe we'll have a champion after all!"_

It's all nonsense. So he could paint himself with mud? How will that help him? If anyone is to win this it would be Katniss. Katniss who blew up the careers' food. Katniss who is skilled with a bow and arrow.

Katniss who is now assuring him he won't die. I want her to be wrong. I really, really want her to be wrong, because if he doesn't die, she'll have to. I don't care what the Gamemakers say. I know they won't let both of them live. And I really don't want them to. I don't want them to come back to District 12 and be happy and get married. It would just make me miserable.

She leans down and he whispers in her ear. I wonder if he knows that all of Panem will be discussing what was said tonight. All of Panem except me.I don't want to know.

She laughs in response. I feel sick. I miss her. I miss her laugh and her smile and her playful shoves. I miss her.

I let my mind wander as she struggles to pull Peeta in the water.

Should I have volunteered in Peeta's place? Should I be the one she's saving?

That was out of the question. I didn't have that choice. If we had both gone, our families would've been helpless. My family would be dying of starvation, Mrs. Everdeen would be depressed, and Primrose would be all alone. No. I could never have done it. I would never leave our families helpless.

But what if I had? I can't help but dwell on it. Would I have been "the boy on fire"? Would I have been there at the arena to protect her? Would I have told Caesar Flickermanthat I was in love with her? Would webe the couple all of Panem rooted for?

I am pulled out of my thoughts seeing the blood gushing from Peeta's leg. She pretends like she is fine with it, all the blood, but I know better. I know her. I know why she was never around the house when a patient was with her mother. I know the forest was her escape from the blood and puss and sickness.

She continues cleaning the wound, with her face pale. She forces him to eat the pears she had stowed away in her pack. She is patient and kind. She is a different Katniss. His Katniss would have sighed and shoved the pears in his face. She would have told him to clean his own wound. She would have-

But this is not his Katniss. She is The Game's Katniss now. Not his. Not Peeta's. She's the Capitol's toy. Something to keep the folks at home entertained.

And then I heard the words I'd been dreading since she stepped in that stream. "How about that kiss?" I knew everyone in Panem was cheering. This is what they want. This was what they had been starving for. Time for Katniss to profess her love for Peeta. This is what they want. But was this what she wants?

She laughs at him. She _laughs _at him. Suddenly my lungs are working again.

She finishes cleaning him up while joking and talking about hunting and Haymitch They hold a conversation easily, equal counterparts in intelligence and wit.I'm sure everyone is just eating it up.

They try to retreat to somewhere safer so Peeta can heal in peace, but it seems impossible. He immediately looks paler and just a couple of yards and I'm sure he will be sick. She lets him regain himself and then drags him up towards a tiny cave. She sets up camp for them, while trying to get Peeta to take medicine and eat. He refuses.

He begins thanking her. Thanking her for saving his life. As he should.

"Just in case I don't make it back-" he begins

But then Katniss acts a little more like herself and cuts him off, "No, Peeta. I don't even want to discuss it."

He tries to continue, "But I-"

And my stomach is once again in knots. My world begins falling down around me. She just kissed him. Was there a mutual attraction that hadn't been there before. Had the Games changed something in her? I know it might be ridiculous, but I've always imagined me ending up with Katniss. We were perfect for each other. We we're best friends. Sometimes I wondered if we were more. We shared everything with each other. I knew all her secrets and she knew all mine. I understand she doesn't want children. I even agreed with her. Everyone in town assumed we would marry each other next year when I turn 18,

But suddenly there was Peeta. Suddenly I was out of the picture. The people in the Seam didn't ask me when he'd finally get up the courage to ask her; instead they wanted to know what I thought of Peeta. Suddenly it I wasn't the only one taking care of Prim, but the baker too. My whole world was being turned upside down. And I don't like it. I don't like it at all.

When I finally jolt out of my thoughts it's only because someone has sent them somek kind of murky brown broth.

Hours pass as Katniss works on feeding Peeta the broth, yet the cameras stay on them. This is the longest, or so says my mother, that the camera has every stayed on a group of tributes.

I sit and watch. Silent. In pain. She forces down the broth through threats and kisses. She's like the very flowers she use to show me in the woods. Deadly. Dangerous. Beautiful.

After she crawls into the sleeping bag with Peeta they switch to another tribute lost, half blinded by some poison ailing them. I decide this is as good a time as any to go to bed. My brothers promise to wake me up if Katniss returns to our screens.

I lie in the bedroom I share with my three brothers, though it's empty because they are currently watching the Games. I curl up under the thin blanket. Then suddenly I'm running. Katniss is ahead of me, looking back at whatever horror is chasing us. It must be monsterous. The only time she's every looked that scared was the first time I caught her in the woods. She looks exactly as she did that day actually. Lost. Frightened. Stunning. Then she slips and falls. She turns pale as I near her. Whatever is chasing us isn't slowing down. I want to try to stop and help her, but my legs won't stop moving. They keep their steady pace against the ground. Boom, boom, boom, boom. I run. Boom, boom, boom, boom. I hear her screams ringing in my ears. Boom. Boom.

I wake up sweating, Daylight is streaming through my window. I breathe. It was just a dream. But somehow my own footsteps still haunt my ears. Boom, boom, boom, boom.

I drag myself to the monitor. A tribute trips and cuts open her knee.

I close my eyes. My head is aching. Boom, boom, boom, boom.

Suddenly she's on my screen again. I've never been so glad to see her alive. The footsteps soften.

"Tell me about the happiest day you can remember." Peeta says from the screen.

"Did I ever tell you about how I got Prim's goat". Suddenly my heart stops, and not because she's kissing Peeta. Because this is a story that involves me. A story that involves us. A story in which we were hunting illegally and trading in the Seam. A story that could get us killed.

The memories resurface. I see the two arrows pinning the buck in unison, I can almost hear our soft laughter as we drag the heavy buck through the dark streets. I can feel the heavy coins weighing down my pockets as I walk her home.

Beside the fact that this story could get us both killed, it feels wrong for her to tell it. It's one of my favorite days I've shared with her. It's too intimate for her to share with the whole world.

But she tells it anyway. But not really. Stelling a fairytale. She fabricates a world were she sold her mothers locket for money to buy the goat. It's a lie, because if Mrs. Everdeen had owned a locket, it would have been sold long ago. But Katniss makes everyone believe. Even I want to. Katniss is telling a story so beautiful and innocent that I know she just won over everyone's hearts.

She talks of how I carried him home and how she tied a pink ribbon around his neck.

Everytime she says my name, my heart jumps into my throat. I wish she could come home right now. I need her back.

"They sound like you," Peeta whispers as she finishes

And suddenly it's not just Katniss telling the world the story of how she made her little sister's birthday, but Katniss and Peeta talking about life back home and pink ribbons. And it's heartbreaking. I can't stand it. I stand up to leave the room. I want to hunt or to _anything_ to get away from this pain I've been putting myself through. Why do insist on watching her slowly die? There's nothing I can do to save her. And suddenly the footsteeps are back manifesting my thoughts. All I can hear is boom boom, boom boom. I think I'll be sick. I sit back down. I can't move. My eyes lock once again on the screen.

I can't leave her. If I stop watching it's like I didn't try to save her. It's like I don't care. And I care. I really really care. I have to force my self through this agonizing pain.

Then suddenly Claudius Temple smith is inviting them to the feast. This is it. We are in the last leg of the Game. I can feel it. Claudis invites them to join him and at first Katniss waves him off. Then he annouces a very important detail. He has something they need. Her eyes flicker to Peeta's leg. She puts a look of determination on her face.

"You're no risking your life for me," Peeta tells her.

But she is. Regardless of what I want or he wants, she'll do what she wants. What _they _want. And there's no stopping her. That's what I use to love about her. She was fearless and determined. I'm not so sure how I feel about that anymore. Now those qualites I use to love about her seem unsafe and insane.

She promises him she won't. But Peeta is as aware as I am that she's lying.

She goes down to the stream. As she stares at her reflection a parachute floats down into the stream next to her. She looks at the vial. I know what's in it. So does she. She mixes the sleep syrup into mashed berries and mint leaves and gives it to Peeta. Just as he realizes how she's poisoned him, the medicine takes over his body and he's out cold. She takes one last look at their concealed cave before heading to the feast.

As she runs away her footsteps match the ones in my dream. Boom boom, boom boom.


End file.
